#thoughts

As the day comes closer, the unknown fear creeps in again covering the windpipe, breathing in pain.. Remembering all the days I lazed and neglected to pray all mistakes I made which price I might need to pay! I look above in the sky, a tear dropping from the eye. A plea running trough my mind praying to God, to make it all right! Thinking of all the things, I did wrong, all that I could've been better at.. How I dont deserve it but how badly I need it.. All negative thoughts giving me a chill but still believing in God's will Begging that my hope will not be killed. Telling myself to keep faith and see knowing that "he" is right there, holding my hand, standing with me!!                                                                                                                   -PS

It is Karva Chauth tomorrow and I see people all around shopping, applying hennas on hands and visiting beauty saloons and then it strikes me that I will never happen to be celebrating this beautiful tradition! Sigh! All my dreams since childhood gets shattered! I hate my boyfriend at such times! (obviously who is not a Punjabi!) Didn't half of the girls in their teens want to get married to a Punjabi? Well I did for their grand weddings and the churas! Love them!  Oh ya for all those who don't know, The Karva Chauth is an old tradition followed mostly in northern parts of India. The married women fast the whole day without food and water until they see the moon and pray for their husbands long life. Sweet thing no? But I see this fasting becoming a fad now. See around and you'll find all girlfriends fasting for their boyfriends/ crushes. And thanks to our very own YRF and the idiot box we have our husbands under pressure to fast for their wives just like SRK did!

I took chances, once too many a times Always dreaded this would happen Being left alone to burn, Am sorry for what I have done. I never wanted to lose the friendship over an inner crisis Wish our love could sustain my madness Not cramping your heart with sadness. Now you stand there on the other side Watching me tortured with glee Why don’t you hear my hearts screaming tones? Death of my brittle bones? My soul’s fractured moans?! I feel afraid and cold Trapped behind these walls My sobs are the only sound Why have you hidden me from your sight? Losing you is my worst fright Why don’t you want to hear me? I long to tell u how I feel Why can’t you hear the echoes of my heart cry in pain? Hurting you was my only fear, All I want now is you near! Tell me what can I do to make this right? To live my dreams true, To create warm happiness? To let my soul breathe with freeness? To make you love me back? For eternity?                                       -PS

Traveling a thousand miles, to bring back my smiles. The trouble, the pain, will all be worth the gain. The heart being gripped by uncertainty, the wait feels like eternity. Our hearts knitted with each other, to face the struggle together. Our love will pass the test of time and then you’ll forever be mine!         -PS                                                                      

Once while I was squandering time, I came across this handsome prince of mine! Eyes filled with dreams, that exhibits heaven in a glimpse. The bright smile on the face, which brings tingles to my heart. Each time I look at you spell-bound, I feel lucky to have found an angel walking on ground! You are my knight in shinning armour, with a great sense of humour! Love the way you make me melt, with the tender hug and the lovely scent! Whenever I am sad or blue, you turn everything just so right and true. You holding my hand, a secured feeling, thanking God, for sending you as a blessing! Don't know what is destined in our fate, but you will always be the bestest mate! Cherishing every moment from the start, hoping to never drift apart. Promising love, all that I can give, for as long as I live! You are so special that I want you to know.. I truly, madly, deeply love you so!                        -PS

I,was 39 when I had my first one night stand. And one of those which i didn't even realise. I was pretty positive about getting into a relationship after my divorce with my husband. I met this guy call Sagar (lets, say) in a pub. I was out with my friends. Sagar with his friends on the table close by. Sagar offered us a drink, we spoke a bit over the drink and drinks followed.. There were some sparks between us and I somewhere knew something would happen but I wasn't aware I would land up in bed with him that night itself. Sagar whispered into my ears," I am already in love, can we make love?" and I didn't even realise when i said yes! The next day I woke up with a good feeling. We met up a couple of times. But then he had to leave for Germany. Anyway we both weren't interested in anything further. There was no contact between us, not that i bothered. After a few years i bumped into him again at a coffee shop. It was a very pleasant surprise. We met a